Thursday, January 6, 2011

Alec Baldwin, The Man of My Dreams?!? What??

Alec Baldwin, get outta my dreams.


The last few nights I have had dreams that I can barely remember, except for a few small details. And all of the dreams have one thing in common: Alec Baldwin.

These aren't sex dreams. Nope, not at all. They aren't really any kind of dream, I think. But in each one, I'll turn a corner or something and there he'll be -- Alec Baldwin, doing something normal.

In one dream, just before my new supervisor started, I was working in my office when the Associate Dean of the College brought around my new supervisor, Jack Donaghy from 30 Rock. Played by Alec Baldwin. Does that make me Tina Fey? I'd be OK with that, she seems bright and funny.

In the next dream, I was outside weeding my front flower bed, Milo and Violet were running all over and the twins were snoozing on a blanket in the shade. Scott was doing something with the chickens, when Alec Baldwin biked up and asked to buy a dozen eggs. Yes, he was biking on a gravel road. Wearing a tuxedo. And no helmet.

In the last dream, I was at the grocery store all by myself (whee! a mother's escape!) and as I was reaching for a carton of yogurt, Alec Baldwin asked me to recommend a flavor: strawberry or peach. Strawberry, of course. He still wasn't wearing a helmet.

I don't get celebrity crushes. Especially when the celebrity seems to be a bit of a, ahem, flake. I think this is mostly because Scott and I have been streaming 30 Rock on Netflix through the Wii and watching it after the kids go to bed. At least I hope that's the case. I told Scott about it and he nearly fell out of our bed laughing about the yogurt dream. Then again, he once told me about a dream where he walked in on me in a compromising position with Ted McGinley from Married With Children. I think I laughed equally as hard at that one. Thank goodness neither of us gets jealous of our spouse's insane dreams...

Stay tuned to see what else I dream about Alec Baldwin... I know you're as befuddled as I am about it. It's kinda like watching a really fat chick waddle by with a whale tail -- you want to look away, but the rippling buttocks are mesmerizing...

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