Wednesday, March 18, 2009


I cannot believe that nearly a month has elapsed since my last entry. Bad girl!

It has been quite a month, too. Scott has made several trips -- Nashville (Ass-ville, according to Milo), Connecticut, and now Cincinnati. I've taken on increasing responsibilities at work, culminating in the visit of a guest speaker/author/physician today. And we have interviewed three candidates in four working days for my supervisor's position. My first choice was offered the position and she *eagerly* accepted on the spot. I am thrilled!

Violet is talking more and more. Last night, she had a fit because while the kids were bathing in the tub, I was pawing through the clean clothes in the dryer to find clothing suitable for an indoor day at daycare. In the process of looking for clean clothes, I pulled out a pair of her new pajamas, then put them back in the dryer. When the kids were done with their baths, I was drying her off, Milo was shrugging into his new pajamas and I reached for the pair she'd worn the night before. She saw them, glared at me, crossed her arms so that I couldn't slip them into her sleeves, and said, "No! Nunnah! Nunnah!"

Clearly confused, I said, "It's time for your jammies!"

"Noooo! Nunnah! Nunnah!"

I realized she wanted something else. I let her down from my lap and she scrambled up the step and into the bathroom, where she pointed at the dryer, calling, "Nunnah! Nunnah!" I fished out the new jammies and held them up to her. She beamed, nodding and approving, "Huh! Huh!" Apparently, eighteen months is the time at which girls become insistent on their appearance...

Milo, on the other hand, is finding himself seeing the world through the eyes of his best friend. Particularly when it comes to what he's wearing. If I suggest something, he'll answer, "Yes! Mark likes that shirt!" or "No. Mark doesn't like that..." He feels too young to be concerned about what the world is thinking of him, but this anxiety has been coming on for about a year and I don't see it abating. He is still very afraid to enter a room full of strangers for fear that they are looking t him. He is fine entering or leaving s store or a place where he is anonymous, but anywhere I need to introduce him makes him petrified. He tenses his entire body, flushes, and climbs me like a tree.

I don't want him to be so concerned with the rest of the world -- but he wants to do things right and worries that he'll make mistakes. I try to point out to him all of the times I've made mistakes and have no issue in making mistakes, correcting myself, and pointing it out to him, but his inner perfectionist is growing louder and louder. I know how he feels -- I was that kid, and so was Scott. Scott doesn't believe me, but I think that his intellectual development is just enough ahead of his emotional development that he's struggling because he understands more than his emotions can handle. He is a bright and perceptive child. He asks outstanding questions about his world and observes so many things that I miss or overlook. But I think with that ability comes caution and he's very cautions of new situations. He doesn't like to try anything until he's certain that when he DOES try, he'll get it right. So we've introduced the concept of practicing to him. It helps some.

Violet, on the other hand, seems to have not a care in the world. Oh, sure she's got opinions and prefers it when she gets her way, but her general attitude sort of suggests that she knows no one is really paying THAT much attention to her (in the grand scheme of things) and that as long as she looks like she knows what she's doing, she is probably doing it right. I never really see her fail at anything, though, because she has an unusual combination of persistence and patience. She'll keep at it until she gets it because she is generally not frustrated by much. She's a very capable toddler, for certain, dressing herself and feeding herself -- she prefers an open cup these days to a sippy and properly uses a spoon and fork (most of the time).

It is so very interesting to me to watch them become the people that they are -- someone said to me today, "Having another child seems crazy at this point -- I feel like I just got this one figured out!" I guess if you have them close enough together you don't get that feeling of having figured a child out -- I know I haven't gotten Milo completely figured out and certainly not Miss Independent. Then again, I'm not sure I have ME figured out yet...

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