I got the blahs...

There are so many things I should be doing right now. Blogging isn't necessarily one of them, but here I am. I have a to-do list a mile long for work and the house is a pit, due mostly to sick kids the past week. I haven't been able to properly clean as the dining room catch-all went to Hades when I was in Denver -- it is simply not a priority for Scott to keep things orderly. But I have always known that bout him, so I have little about which to complain. I married him knowing that he doesn't like to put stuff away until he suddenly can't find something important.

We have been watching Battlestar Galactica (the new version) and it makes me want to act. I haven't been onstage since fall of 2000 and that's a really long time for me. But the idea of rehearsing a show in the evenings whilst working all day seems cruel -- I'd be losing precious time with my babes. The time is so short that I don't want to miss any minute of it. So my creative energy is stifled right now.

I've fallen off the exercise wagon and can't seem to get back on it. I'll force myself to run tonight before the kids go to bed. It's important and I need to do it. Half an hour and the treadmill is right there in the room with them.

I've also been browsing house plans. I think it's sort of nuts to think we can afford to build a home right now. Like, really nuts. I don't think Scott has a good grip on exactly how expensive it will be. Concrete and HVAC cost moolah and a lot of it. Yes, we can do most of the rest of it, but I don't know that it is the right move for us this instant. On the other hand, I think we can fit three kids in the nursery if we have to -- Milo will love sleeping in a loft above Violet's toddler bed, I just know it! We're not expecting a third yet, but one of these days...

Speaking of the kids, Milo will start preschool next year, yay! And boo because he's getting older and behaving more and more like a real kid. Although he was asking me yesterday what would happen as he gets older and I said, "Well, you may not believe it now, but when you get older you won't want me to kiss you goodnight and you'll think everything I say is stupid."

His eyes widened and he clutched my hand tighter, "No, Mommy, you're smart! You are always smart! I love it when you kiss me good night!"

I do, too, baby...